She wants the pain. I sense something dark in her past that bay effect her in the future. I finally get the courage to get up and leave. I run out the door leaving her there to fend for herself. Hearing her yell for me causes me to run faster. I dont know what it is, but its not right. Arriving at the hotel Mizuhashi seemed worried that i was back so early. He seen me leave no less than two hours ago. Not stopping i just ran into the room and into the bedroom. My heart is still beating uncontrollably. I cant stand it. What happened? Why cant i do it? Im confused more than worried. Ive already had most of her in the sauna and then again at her apartment. I lay in bed thinking about everything. Suddenly Ana slipped her way into my mind. I miss her so much. I want to hold her in my arms again. Tears begin to trail down my cheek as i begin to think of the past. My own darkness has been haunting me lately. I can feel something terrible is going to happen. A knock at the door causes me to. ‘I knew this would be hard,’ she said. ‘But this part has to be over. Just hold me, Charlie. That’s what I came here for.’ His eyes were wet, and he tried to hold it in. But then, he burst out, ‘It’s been eight months, and you don’t want me!’ He wept then, like a child. ‘It isn’t that,’ she said. ‘You know it isn’t that. This is just the way it has to be.’ He pulled himself together, or tried to. ‘I know,’ he said. ‘I understand.’ ‘You always did,’ she said, smiling at him. He dried his eyes and smiled back then. ‘Besides,’ she said. ‘Look at me, Charlie. I’m old.’ He touched her cheek. ‘You’re still the most beautiful woman God ever made.’ She smiled and shook her head. ‘Just hold me,’ she said. He held her for a while, and he talked of how he had said, when they began again, that it was enough for him that they were friends. She smiled and snuggled close. ‘And we are,’ she whispered. ‘Always. I do still love you, Charlie.’ That helped. When she left, she promised: ‘It won’t.
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